THE MINDLESS THREAD

[Papa Tiger]

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[Papa Tiger]

WELCOME TO THE PSYCHIATRIC HOTLINE;

IF YOU ARE OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE, PLEASE PRESS 1 MANY TIMES.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.

If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.

If you are anxious, just start pressing numbers at random.

IF YOU ARE PHOBIC, DON'T PRESS ANYTHING.

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If you are annal retentive, please hold.

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[Papa Tiger]

IF YOU POST REPETATIVELY, IT WASN'T IN THE DIRECTIONS.

 

[Papa Tiger]

The Pioneers and the Oregon Trail means so much to our Culture here today.

 

[Papa Tiger]

Pleas follow the directions closely.

 

[Papa Tiger]

 

[Papa Tiger]

 

[Papa Tiger]

 

[Papa Tiger]

 

[Papa Tiger]

You know the time of year don't cha?

 

[Papa Tiger]

Amazing delivered my box of deodorant last week.
The instructions say, "remove top, push up bottom".
When I fart the room smells lovely....
I don't think it does that well with B.O.

 

[Papa Tiger]

 

[Papa Tiger]

Hauling baskets of Tomatoes or Watermelons from The Field was my offer.

 

[Papa Tiger]

As the ambulance takes the body away, Ronnie says, “Well, shucks, someone should go and tell his wife.”

Donnie says, “OK, I’m pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I’ll do it.”
Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of Budweiser.
Ronnie says, “Where did you get that beer, Donnie?”
“Cooter’s wife gave it to me,” Donnie replies.

“That’s unbelievable, you said her husband is dead and she gives you beer?”

“Well, not exactly”, Donnie says. “When she answered the door, I said to her, “You must be Cooter’s widow.?

She said, “You must be mistaken. I’m not a widow.”

Then I said, “I’ll bet you a case of Budweiser you are!"

 

[Papa Tiger]

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